• Dana L. Butler

For the Days You Feel So Inadequate (Like You’ll Never Be Enough)

Hiya my friends,

I’m hailing today from the aftermath of a weekend of 3-year-old birthday celebrations and grandparents visiting.

And as of today?   My kiddos are a little on the sicky side and I have a feeling I’ll be taking it slow with them for the next couple days.

In light of that, I’m bringing you this short post from the archives.  From my very first month of intentional blogging – August, 2012.  Revamped and ready to roll, in honor of the “What I’ve Learned in 1 Year of {serious} Blogging” series (to which we’ll return later this week).

Thanks for understanding – and I hope you enjoy this glimpse into my so-one-year-ago-but-still-need-this-stuff-daily heart.


Wifehood, motherhood, and ministry – and just life in general – they all have this way of making you constantly question whether you’re enough.

Strong enough, gentle enough, loving enough, firm enough, consistent enough, giving enough, in-tune enough with people’s needs,  spending enough time with the Lord.  

The list goes on.  And on.

But who defines “enough,” really? Is “enough” even quantifiable?

And when it all comes down, isn’t it more about HIS enough-ness than mine anyway?

All these moments of failure –

  1. of raising my voice at my son in anger

  2. of forgetting to trust Stan’s leadership as my husband, failing to trust his heart toward me

  3. of neglecting to follow through on a commitment I made to a precious friend in our house church

  4. of not feeling like I know our neighbors well enough

Sometimes all this blaring inadequacy makes me feel like burying my head in the sand and not coming out for a few months.  

Know the feeling?

AND THEN- this whispering knock at my heart: “You’ll NEVER be enough, Dana.”  

The voice of the enemy?

NO.  The loving whisper of the Father: “You’ll never be enough. It’s true.  It’s not your job to be.”

Deep sigh.

Oh, yes Lord.

How quickly I forget.

How quickly I forget how He fills in my gaps.

How His strength is made perfect in my weakness.

How I can relax and just lean, and He moves mountains.

How His invitation is to open up my weaknesses and inadequacies to Him so they can be filled, like a canyon is carved by the water running through it.

How His rivers of mercy carve this raw beauty into my heart when I let go of control, of striving to be enough.

How my inadequacy can become a channel for Grace – His Grace that carves deeper still, making room for more.  And how it spills out all around me – His manifest glory all over these places in which I’m not enough.   Oh Father, how are You so beautiful and so good? I am just wrecked by this mercy that grabs hold of my heart and births beauty in all of my gaps.

And in the midst of His glory being revealed all over my inadequate, beautiful mess?  The Holy Spirit reminds me, “There is no space between a river and the rock it carves.”

Yes Lord.  No space between Your heart and mine.

A reminder that all this weakness and beauty is about 2 things: His glory, AND His pursuit of intimate friendship with me.  

Deeper trust.

More leaning into Him.

Which brings Him more glory anyway, and oh, I so long for Him to be glorified in my life.

Even in my weak places

Especially in my weak places.

Be blessed today friends, in the midst of your inadequacy, to encounter His heart more and more.

**Resurrected from the archives.**

[As always, your thoughts are so welcome, friend.  Reading via email or a reader and care to leave a comment?  Click here to hop over to the blog.]

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