• Dana L. Butler

Day 28: An Unconventional Birth Story {sort of}


Morning comes too early yet again, annnnd yet again I find myself with no pre-written post to share today.

I sat down two different times yesterday, began typing words, trying to wrap language around some facet or another of the fire in my belly… and both times, I got 5 or 10 minutes in, and the dissonance, for lack of better terminology, was so strong that I needed to put the writing down and come back later.

Something was off.

I may sound crazy, y’all, and believe me — this whole 31 Days thing has stretched me beyond myself to the point where I have moments of wondering, too. But I knew that I knew that the words I was banging out onto the screen yesterday — they weren’t the right ones.

So last night when I sat down to write, again with fire in my bones that I knew needed to come out, yet continued to feel the same dissonance? I stopped. Prayed (again).

And then I did something I very, very rarely do. I asked for prayer over my process. I posted this on my personal Facebook wall:

“Hey, my friends. Writing tonight, and could use prayer that what needs to come out, will come. Stand with me?”

The response just about made me cry, y’all. “Like” after “like” poured in, along with comments of support and encouragement and yes, prayer.

I was undone by the number of my friends, and my acquaintances through this beautiful writing world, who liked or commented. I felt encircled. Covered in prayer and care as I continued to hunker down on my couch with my little laptop and my small words and this holy, burning love vibrating inside me, deep and furious.

And then…

The realization hit me. Actually, it was more like a divine whisper in my core:

Dana, this isn’t a blog post. Put down the computer. Grab your notebook, girl. This is a song.

Oh. A song. Well, that doesn’t give me a blog post for tomorrow morning, but… okay.

I kid you not — it was a mere 4 minutes, maybe, from the time you all began to pray, and the time I traded computer for notebook.

The lyrics came, y’all, like a river, complete with melody running through my head as I nearly illegibly scribbled verse, chorus, tag lines onto the page.

And I don’t talk like this often, but you guys? I felt like I birthed that song. The burning inside me — this deep, almost uncomfortable knowing that SOMEthing needed to come out — it settled, calmed even as I put pen to paper and scratched out those lyrics.

And you, my friends who prayed me through? I’ll just say it was incredible and perfect and so just like God, how you prayed, and then, bam — it all just flowed.

And I don’t have a lot else to say this morning as I sit here, propped up in bed while it’s still dark outside, just reveling in this small {but huge to my heart} manifestation of God’s sweetness to me.

I will share the song as soon as my voice is able (I’m a bit hoarse due to a cough). For now though? Just know, you guys, that I value your support, your care, your companionship in this space, so. much. more. than I can tell you in words.

I am so thankful we’re on this journey together.

___________

This post is part of my 31 Days series, Rooted: 31 Days of Authenticity (from my life in limbo). You can find the entire series here.

Also, if you don’t want to miss future posts or song reveals, I invite you to subscribe to receive each post in your inbox.

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